You know my heart is switched on to this subject, every cell of my being knows that emotional intelligence development will make all the difference individually and collectively.
Most of my certainty comes less from the hours of research and more from being a mother.
Watching eight children grow from tiny to HUGE over twenty three years has enlightened me..and frightened me!
Parenthood has been such an eye opener, to see how programmable we humans actually are. What was hypothetical to me twenty years ago is now a concrete reality as my eldest children are clearly walking my talk of way back then!
What I have noticed is that they are quicker to change than I was, that along with all the uncertainty that they picked up from me as a teenage mother they also got a good measure of philosophical drive and desire to evolve!
Each of my children has enlightened a different section of my path and helped me navigate the world of Emotional Intelligence Education. watching them it became easy to see that although one way won’t work for everyone, the simple acknowledgement of that fact opens the door to what WILL work.
I have also seen that other people are, to a degree, beholden to our energy in the moment and to the energy dynamic created in the interaction. It is possible to withdraw ourselves from an intense situation but as we all know once the energy is up it tends to be quite difficult.
This is why emotional intelligence development is essential for smooth passage throughout our lives.
What is Emotional Intelligence?
Emotional Intelligence, amongst a plethora of other things, is the recognition of emotions in the self and others. What the emotions are, how they feel in the body, what the appropriate RESPONSE to the situation is. It is understanding that you are never really responding to the situation at hand but more so to the emotional response in your body as you are confronted by the situation.
For example- one day your child might throw a tantrum and you respond with patience and calm. You understand that he is frustrated and he will settle down in a moment. You don’t get caught up in it and in fact he stops soon after and all is well again. But the next day he once again throws a tantrum; to the same degree over the same thing and you can’t handle it. You feel the energy rising in your body, your skin gets hot, you feel like losing your cool and throwing a tantrum yourself. You yell a bit and feel like crying…he doesn’t stop as quickly which just fuels your fire. In the end it all settles down, but everyone is left emotionally exhausted.
This difference in response is due to your personal state. For whatever reasons your stress levels are higher on the second day, your breathing probably shorter.
The less self-awareness we have activated the more inconsistent our emotional reactions are going to be. And when we have children, well, they suffer.
But it is never to late to set the intention of raising our self-awareness and developing our emotional intelligence!
Developing the self-awareness aspect of emotional intelligence helps to finetune our responses so that others don’t take the brunt for our personal lack of stress management.
It also helps us recognise when stress levels are in fact rising so we can address them sooner rather than later.
Awaking in the morning and dedicating a few minutes to breathing deeply is an excellent kick off point. From there we can feel our body relax, we can consciously allow our tension to evaporate. Smiling on our face and in our heart is a beautiful start followed with a small yet powerful intention- Today I will raise my self-awareness. I am worth listening to. Today I will watch what I think and listen to my own words.
By setting ourselves on this path we find ourselves getting to know ourselves and within this is our power to change what we find we don’t like!
Yes emotional intelligence is the key to our calm and with calm responses come solutions and soon we are feeling on top of the world.
I call that SUCCESS!
Until next time keep breathing,
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